It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Its been a journey over the last 6 months or so since I have fallen from my way of being in His guidance. The struggle of fighting the flesh back and forth. Wanting what is right, yet the urges of my own desires haunting me and following me close by trying to win me over. Logic coming in and making sense of what doesn't make sense. Whispering to me..."it's ok to do what you're doing. It's only bad because they don't understand." Mixed up by the actual truth! Confused by seduction of understanding of someone not of God. God was showing me but I was unable to see Him behind the fog.
I AM HE
The fog is becoming mist which is dissipating. The mist hitting my face refreshing me and bringing me back to the love God has for me. The mist being like verses and subtle blessings of love from others. To see and understand the sin behind all that happened. To see what had been pressing me down and keeping me a slave to something other than Him. God, in His infinite wisdom, never let me go and He knew it. Instead, allowed me to see things slowly. Letting me feel the pain so I could see Him more.
The more I walk through this, I see the hurt from the other side. Who the other person is really like apart from God. The emptiness and loneliness that is there and unable to fulfill. Something so real in my own life that I am oh so able to relate to. God reaching down to remind me to still love her but be consumed by Him. Show her MY love through you. It hurts but I am here.
RAIN DOWN ON ME
I turn around to be able to see that I can bless Him. Bless His Name for all that He is showing me and giving me. It IS a blessing because He reminded me of where I have been with my emptiness and the love that I couldn't feel but now feel with Him in my life. The easy sway of what takes me away from Him and seeing the seductor of Satan.
Something I learn more and more of each day. I am a person with a big heart and cares a lot (too much sometimes). Has a heart for wanting to learn more of God who love me so much that I don't understand it and want to be able to give that love to others. God has been so patient with me and all the craziness I have put Him through. May I be there for someone else in the same way.